Thanks to my previous jobs that I
got to travel around the urban and rural landscapes of our country which not
many of are privileged to visit. I have worked and dealt with all sorts of
'Indian men' coming from all walks of life. From film stars to commoners, from
village sarpanchs to high level government officials, from a simple school
teacher to professors of Ivy League universities, from young, younger, youngest
to the oldest, I have been lucky to meet them all. And my experience as a young
women travelling alone across India has been quiet contradictory to both the
articles.
While travelling in a bus or an
overcrowded shared autos and jeeps, even I have felt fingers brushing and hands
slipping. Even I felt violated, but that did not stop me from taking these modes
of transport, I learned that a magical sentence, "Uncle your hand is
touching my body" while uttered in a clear, determined and audible voice was
enough to solve the problem.
While travelling in cities like
Mumbai and Delhi I met disgusting stares from random guys, but at the same time
I met some of the warmest taxi and rickshaw drivers. They did only drop me
safely to my destinations but also shared amazing stories of their life and
city. I learnt that starting a conversation does not get you in trouble but
most of the times it gets you out.
I have friends and best friends who
are men, 'Indian men'. They argue restlessly about how gender bias is a state
of mind. They give discourses on troubles of the modern Indian male who wants
to dominate and get dominated by the modern Indian women. Yet every time I
forget my wallet home and get my petrol tank full they are more than happy to
come and pay my bill. When I randomly faint on roads they rush me to the doctor
and joke about my great fall, or when I have to crib and complain about some
brash members of their spices, they not only provide a listening ear but also
join in.
The truth is that there are sides
to every coin, while some cross their lines many condemn. Just being a man does
not make them tyrants. We women oppose systems and set of mind, we never really
oppose our darling male counterparts. :)
